This is probably one of the most frequently asked questions I get when I talk to people. I’m usually asked that question after hearing me talk about the importance of knowing why you are and how fulfilling your life will be when you find your purpose and start pursuing it. Who I am? Because I am here? These questions have been asked for centuries. This question is at the birth of exploration, it was the spark of many wars and conquests and has given rise to innumerable philosophies and religions.
How do I find My Purpose? You can see it?
AL Hollingsworth taught me a very important lesson; if you can’t see it, it’s very difficult to do it. That’s not literal, but the concept is still true. It looks something like this: If he asked you to give me a pooku shmooku, what would you give me? Exactly! But if I told you that a pooku shmooku is like a pencil, when I ask you to hand me a pooku shmooku, what would you give me? Exactly! Would you pass me a pencil.
You first had to see what it was before you could take any action. This is very important when you are in the planning/visioning part of your process. It amazes me how a potter can take a lump of clay and see the finished product in that lump of clay and begin to work it out of the lump of clay, so to speak; they see it first, and then begin the process of bringing it into existence. This may seem like a very simplistic perspective, but it is very applicable. When I said that you have to see it before you can do it, it could start as a simple thought or idea.
Any successful endeavor requires the ability to see what it should look like and how it will look; There may be some minor or even major adjustments that take place after the work begins, but there must be a vision first. Do you see? There is one thing that I think is very important for you to remember as you navigate this process and that is the fact that it may take some time before you really discover what your purpose is. Many times the answer is right in front of you, but most people tend to overlook or ignore it because it’s so obvious. Ever since I was in fifth grade, you would find me helping people, especially if they were being bullied or perceived as underdogs.
Well, I’ve always been that kind of person; even if I felt powerless to do anything to help someone. Injustice would drive me insane and I lived a life in my early years as a silent rebel. I would have so many plans to help people, both adults and children; I can remember wanting to prevent teachers from being so mean to some of the kids in my classes that they seemed to bear the brunt of the teacher’s anger. I often sat in silent anger, managing and fuming as I witnessed the injustice happening right in front of me.
I’m sure many of you reading this are nodding in agreement as you remember whatever your hot button was. If you were to take an objective look at your past, I am sure you will begin to see certain patterns that may give you a clue as to why you are. I’m sure there are some people reading this blog post who have a pretty clear idea of what your purpose is, but you may have never thought of it as your purpose, it’s something you do naturally.
For me, vision is tied to direction; How can someone reach their destination, their goal without knowing how to get there? I always say it’s a lot like loading up the SUV and hitting the road to go somewhere you’ve never been and you don’t have some sort of GPS system or road map. You can take your chances and ask some random person on the street and hope they know what they are talking about or you can hope for the best while heading in the direction that seems right to you, just know that this is the right way to go. Hmm, that’s a little sketch for me.
How do I find My Purpose? Are you strong enough?
Okay, here’s the part where I hope I don’t lose some people; this is the part where I use that dreaded four-letter word: work! Many people want to be an agent of change; they want to be that important person. So here comes the heavy lifting, so to speak; it is extremely difficult to have a vision for your future when you are struggling with your present and if we are going to get there, some of you are stuck in your past. Think about it; here you (your emotions, memories and identity) are stuck in the past while trying to get to the future while being flooded in the present.
There are so many times when you tried so hard to keep going, but often you find yourself back where you started and you can’t figure it out; “Why does this keep happening?” The heavy lifting I was referring to is this; If you want to get unstuck in areas of your life, if you know exactly what your purpose or goals are but you just can’t see it, if you’re desperate for things to change, then there’s something I’d like you to do. to consider. I was told this not long ago; we build our life story and our life story may be playing against us.
Based on the things that were told to us and within us, we begin to develop what life is like, because of the things that we witnessed at an early age, because of some of the things that happened to us and how we experience life as a whole; then we begin to begin a life that will confirm what we have previously concluded how our life will be. Many people are oblivious to how they tend to repeat the same activities; they tend to have the same thought processes, the same relationship patterns, and continue to repeat the same types of behaviors. Why is this? Because this type of life does not require any change and because there are no requirements to change the cycle, this “rinse and repeat” cycle has become a safe place to stay.
The interesting thing about this “cycle of life” that we are living can be easily justified; we work hard to defend the things that happen to us and then we blame those things for which we remain stuck. So the question is this; What are you willing to do to allow change to take place in your life?
How do I find My Purpose? edit your story
Much of the story we build about what our lives will be like is lived in the past. People tend to stay here because it’s easier to test and confirm what we predicted our lives would be like. If we are living in the past, how can we see what is in the future? Due to this vicious circle, many people resign themselves to a fruitless search for a difficult goal, never achieving their goal of purpose. We’ve gotten so bogged down with compromise that we settle for fakes. I have to tell you this is not a fun place to be and I know this from personal experience!
Here’s something I want you to think about, you can break this current “life cycle” if you want! I’m going to take this up to the flagpole and see if anyone says hello; Would it surprise you to know that you can actually go from living in the past to living in the present? When we choose to live in the now, the present, we find that infinite possibilities are present and available to us because we are present. If we are present in our daily life, then we have the opportunity to face the things that currently happen to us and around us without being afraid of making mistakes or failing. When we stay present we see things more clearly, we can look at all the possibilities that we have at our disposal.
When you are present, you become responsible for your life and the amazing thing about that truth is this; once you start to take responsibility for your life and learn to operate without those previous restrictions from your past, you can see something really good. You can see that you can start to rewrite our live history, yes! You can create a new life story and start living your life in a way that tests and confirms what you predict your new life will be like! I teach many people how to reconstruct their life story and then I get to see them accomplish things they never thought they would be able to do. Once you can see more clearly, you can better understand why you are and not what your past told you.
Once you are able to see more clearly, you become aware of those things that lie hidden in that past life; when you are able to see all the possibilities that are available to you, you realize all those things that have been talking about the question that used to elude you over and over again. And that question is “why am I here?” “What am I supposed to be doing?” You find your purpose when you stop living in the past while trying to get to a future you always wanted but could never see. When you choose to stay in the present and take responsibility for your life, you can become that much-needed agent of change. It takes some editing on your part, but you can do it.