It’s not unusual these days for friendships to cross cultural boundaries as people become more globally mobile and settle outside their home countries.
Australia is not alone in hosting a diverse population, including a large number of people whose origins lie on the Indian subcontinent.
And as people form lasting friendships at university or at work, they naturally want to invite their non-Indian friends to celebrate important life events, such as weddings.
Indian weddings, whether Muslim, Hindu, Punjabi or other variations on traditions, are colorful and lively events where the ceremonies and celebrations can span several days and some non-Indians may be anxious not to offend because they are unfamiliar with some . of the traditions involved.
The most likely parts of the ceremonial sequence that guests will be invited to are the Mehndi ceremony and the Indian equivalents of the reception.
The Mehndi ceremony is usually, though these days not always, an all-female event during which the bride and some close friends and relatives will have intricate henna (Mehndi) patterns applied to the hands, arms, legs, and feet.
The actual formality of marriage in the Muslim marriage process is called a Nikha and is a very brief formal agreement between the groom and the bride’s close male relatives. It is not usually a public event. The Muslim Indian equivalent of the reception, called a Walima, is a public proclamation and celebration of the wedding to which many guests will be invited. In more traditional families, men and women may celebrate Walima separately.
Guests may be present at the Hindu wedding photographer ceremony, where the father gifts the bride, the bride and groom place garlands around their necks, there are blessings from the priests, and then the couple walks ceremonially bound with scarves around the Holy fire. Hindu reception is generally derived from royal marriage rituals.
Most Indian families do not expect non-Indian guests to wear Indian clothing, although they are delighted if the guests choose to do so. Options for women range from Salwar Kameez, a long robe with pajama-style pants, or Churidars (ruched pants fitted from calf to ankle), to Lehenga and choli plus dupatta (lenhengas are loose, ruched, and embellished). -embroidered skirts, the choli are short, tight-fitting blouses and the dupatta is a long, often gauzy scarf, or even the sari.
The only point of etiquette is that female guests should generally avoid wearing red, which is the traditional color for brides, and also avoid white, the color of mourning, or black.
Colorful and elaborately embroidered clothing is one of the delights of an Indian wedding, in Australia as elsewhere in the world, and provides the subject of some stunning wedding album photos.
Another concern that non-Indian guests have is wedding gifts. Here the general trend is to give a small gift of money, usually inserted in an elaborate envelope containing a greeting card. Sums of money ending in 1 are considered auspicious, so a gift could be $101 or $151, and so on.