We say we want to change things, we set New Year’s resolutions and create lists of self-care goals. We make promises to ourselves and sometimes to other people in our lives.
And, in every moment, we have a choice between what we will say yes to and what we will say no to.
1. Say YES to fear! Doing something new or different can activate some fear in us. This is completely natural. And if we don’t carry it out, we let fear win and we don’t say YES.
2. Say YES to self-care! Even between two less than healthy choices, we can always choose the one that is more nutritious. This sends a message that you are taking care of yourself, that you deserve this care and attention, and that you are taking steps to improve your self-care habits.
3. Say YES to saying NO! When we have the courage to say “no,” whether it’s to a request for time, an offer of a tempting “gift,” or our own negative thinking, we empower ourselves and create evidence that self-care comes first. .
4. Say YES to making decisions! When we say yes to making a decision, it means we’re saying no to “autopilot” behavior, like watching the same TV shows every day because that’s when they’re on, keeping the same routine (whether or not it works ). ), or worrying about finishing the same tasks each week.
5. Say YES to common sense! Keep it simple, usually the best solution is right in front of you and not complicated. Sometimes we resist this because it seems “too easy” or goes against what we are used to and creates fear of change. Many of us overcomplicate things: the more we think, the less we have to do!
How to bring this into YOUR personal care plan:
A. Take a look at your self-care goals and daily practice list and see what actions you haven’t taken yet. Now honestly ask yourself if fear could be one of the things standing in your way. Write about it in a journal or talk about it with someone you trust. Many times the mere fact of realizing that I am afraid “unstuck” me. As Susan Jeffers says in the title of her best-selling book, we can ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’.
B. Pick a day this week to do an experiment. Carry a notebook with you and check off each time you make a choice. Get off “autopilot” – just for a day – and become aware of the choices you are making and the MANY opportunities for self-care in your day.
C. Tune in to your common sense. When things are going crazy in your day, stop for a moment and ask yourself what would be the simplest solution, and then carry it out. Repeat whenever necessary.
(c) Copyright Linda Dessau, 2005.