As a father of four children and a stepdaughter, this topic is always on my mind. How do we raise godly children in this pagan and godless world? Through diligence and love.
I have made my share of mistakes both before and after becoming a mother. My heart cries when I see my children going down the same path that I had traveled. I did my best to give them a solid foundation on which to build their lives and prayed that they would choose the right path. My husband and I joined a local church and faithfully attend with our children. We have done our best to teach them the gospel and point them in the right direction. But can we be sure that they are followed? Nope! Why is this? For the same reason that God cannot force us to do what he does best: free will. Yes, our children have free will.
Sure, we may be able to punish them until they’re thirty (if only!), but we really can’t force them to do what we know is best. Take my oldest son, for example. He turned eighteen last March and at Christmas he decided he knew enough to move out on his own. Except he wasn’t exactly moving in alone, he was moving in with his girlfriend. Knowing the rocky path he was choosing, because I had walked it myself, I pleaded with him to reconsider and follow the path God had chosen for him. It’s not that I don’t like his girlfriend because I like her a lot. But my son was choosing to live in sin. This life that he has chosen can only be difficult.
What’s a parent to do? He hurt me so much that he immediately wanted to lash out at my son. But he knew that wouldn’t solve the problem; That would only drive him further away. It was decided and I wasn’t going to change it. The only person who could change him now was God, but only if my son chooses to listen to him. That left me with only one option; prayer and love.
When our children look beyond our careful teachings and decide to live in the world, all we can do as parents is pray that they find their way back and continue to love them as God loves us. We must also continue to increase our arsenal by reading God’s Word and learning what he says about parenting. He is the supreme father and we must learn through Him.
I don’t love my son any less for the choice he made, but I am so scared for him. I am sad because I know the difficulties that await him and because I know that as long as he continues to live in sin his relationship with God is seriously broken. I can only pray that he repent and restore his relationship and continue to grow into the godly man I trained him to be.